The battle of young tummies

The battle of young tummies

Parliament, our dependable source of fun, has been closed for months.
Lesotho TV is not boring but sickening. You watch it with a two-ply roll of tissue on hand because some of its tosh might send you to the VIP. Rallies have stopped.

The fights in the ABC have long ceased to be comical. The new government is a joke that has since become serious business. The Feselady, the queen of drama queens, is in hibernation after her recent escapades.
It will be cruel to laugh at Uncle Tom as he scrambles for relevance. The pathetic screams of a politician bereft of either support or energy are not hilarious but say.

Pray for the old man.
Lilaphalapha is still okay but needs an urgent infusion of creativity.
The LCD remains a joke but a tired and predictable one. Phori, Uncle Tom’s loyal Chihuahua has been gagged by his party.
All this is to say we are starved of some hysterical drama.

Now we sit sheepishly staring in the empty space like a slay queen who has just swallowed all her R35 at the Kingdom Lounge and cannot charm someone to buy her the next round. Oh, shame!
And that explains why Muckraker is inconsolable after watching a video clip of the argument between Tefo Mapesela and Tsatsanyane Mokherane. It’s yet another fight and drama sabotaged because some good-for-nothing people intervened.

Someone too smart by half thought a fight between equally hefty and garrulous men was a terrible idea.
May those who stopped the fight have pimples all over their bums. May they scratch nonstop until they learn to mind their own business.
There must be a law prohibiting every Jack, Jill, Thabo and Khotso from playing ‘police officer’.

Such self-appointed peacemakers are party poopers. They suck the fun out of pleasurable events.
Muckraker cannot fathom why any sensible person would stop a brawl between two men with tummies the same size. These were two highly quarrelsome men who had volunteered to discipline each other.
They had taken it upon themselves to beat sense into each other’s head.
Both knew they needed some thorough spanking.

Yet some overzealous souls thought otherwise and jumped between the men like the CCL separating quarrelling politicians. They appointed themselves the UN in what was essentially a consensual and fair boxing match.
None of the arbitrators knew the history of the squabble. Not one had bought a ticket to this clash of titans (titans of tummies not mental stamina). They just could not mind their own Hopose. Phew!

Thanks to their interference we have been denied a golden chance to watch how Mapesela and Mokherane can swing their fists. We will never know who the real goat is. Both men will continue to waffle on radio stations, making idle threats and each pretending to be the real Mohammad Ali. It’s such a shame because Muckraker was looking forward to this bout.

Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuu!

muckraker.post@gmail.com

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