The year of many lessons

The year of many lessons

This has been a year of lessons. A year of ‘mantloane. A year of the Mickey Mouse politics. The year of massive looting, brazen bungling and unbridled monkeyshines. It is therefore befitting that we have a list of just a few of the lessons we learned in 2020.

Lessons 1: No government here
The biggest lesson this year is that we don’t have a government but just a collection of good-for-nothing charlatans pretending to be leaders. It will be good if they were walking alone but they insist on dragging us along to their arena of tomfoolery. You don’t judge a government’s probity in good times but during crises.

It is bad times that separate good leaders from pretenders. The Covid-19 crisis did just that but with different results. There was nothing to separate because all of them were pretenders. The crisis was supposed to be a wake-up call to our politicians but they insisted on parading their mediocrity for all to see.

They hastily established the command centre of looting where some evil servants dutifully emptied the national coffers while vigorously pretending to be working. Because of their long fingers we are poorer than we were before the crisis. Of course, half of the looted money ended up in the VIP toilets. But who cares? They say the government’s money is meant to be munched. The promise to help the poor during the lockdown has turned out to be a fat lie told by rotund politicians.

Lesson 2: A name doesn’t do the work
The Nacosec, launched by the newish government of Mr Softie, has proven to be a sickly two-legged donkey. No amount of flogging will resuscitate it. The idea to rebrand the command centre of looting was good but the new animal that came is a damp squib. The name sounds sweet because it doesn’t have ‘command’ in it but the institution remains nothing more than an announcer of statistics.

Its workers are trying hard but they are bogged down by bureaucracy. Khasipe tried to sort it out but he was bound by red tape until he fled back to his actual job. It took him sometime to realise that in Lesotho it is not integrity that matters but sharp elbows. Khasipe innocently thought he was on a national assignment to help the country fight Covid-19. It’s just that someone somewhere thought their job was to work on Khasipe. And boy, did they work on him. By the time he smelt the coffee, he was waist deep in the morass. Instead of working he was busy explaining mundane things like how a secondment works. “I am not getting a salary at Nacosec,” he said. But no one was listening because the point was not to understand things but to muddy the waters until Khasipe could not swim.

Lesson 3: Feselady cannot be reformed
We have always known that the Feselady was a nutty case but nothing could have prepared us for her shenanigans. It was a year in which she showed us that she can be many things terrible. She was a fugitive and violator of Covid-19 rules. Not even jail could stop her from being a rascal.
She smuggled beer into her cell and threw a massive party that left fellow inmates slouched. All this while claiming that she urgently needed to take care of her ill husband. Once out on bail she started gallivanting at parties and concocting stories about someone trying to murder her.

She even had the nerve to accuse the newish government of incompetence in dealing with the Covid-19 pandemic. Muckraker is however thankful to the bedbugs in the prison for baptising her a little bit. Yet recent events have shown that she is irrepressible. The woman doesn’t give a rat’s behind about what people think.

Lesson 4: We are just but a province
For all the screams about our sovereignty we remain just but a province of South Africa. We learned this when the Covid-19 struck. Suddenly we were marooned in our little corners with nowhere to go. Every week we would wait for Ramaphosa to announce new measures that we knew applied to us even though technically he was not our president.

Our so-called government had no choice but to take a cue from him. Even as South Africa was in the throes of the pandemic some Basotho were screaming to go there. Muckraker hopes after these hectic three months we will accept the reality that we are at South Africa’s mercy no matter how much bravado we show.

Lesson 5: Likuena are useless
We learned that our national football teams in all their variations are just pathetic. Likuena specialised in being walloped while the women’s team seem to have forgotten that the point of football is to score more goals than letting them in.

Truly speaking there is no reason why we should be having national football teams here. And we should not bother changing coaches because that will not help. Not even Pep Guardiola will help us win matches. But what do you expect from national teams that get their players from a boozers’ league? Our grounds are potato fields.

What we have in Lesotho is not football but something that resembles football. Yes, we know the rules and can kick the ball but it cannot be described as football. That is why when our teams are thrashed we still insist that they played well.

Lesson 6: It was never about Uncle Tom
You need urgent help if you think Uncle Tom’s demise will change things. Six months after his fall, the country remains a mess. The politicians are still squabbling while the economy tanks and Covid-19 is spreading in the villages. It was never about the Old Timer. We all know that he was not making any decision when he was at the tail end of his political career.

He was just but a stooge. A scarecrow that the boys and girls around him used to threaten their opponents. He has left but our fortunes have not changed. All our politicians do is argue over petty issues. The new leaders seem to have given up steering this country from its ruinous path.

Lesson 7: The real thugs are in uniform
Forget the convenient talk about Lesotho being infested with criminals. The real criminals are in the blue uniform. They are called the police. Remember how they unleashed their terror on the youths who were asking the government to hear their pleas? Well, that was just the smaller part of their thuggery. Before that they had tortured and maimed hundreds in their custody. They haven’t stopped and they are not going to stop. Our misery continues.

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