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Goodbye MCCD

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MCCD, the man from Tsoelike, is retiring from politics after 29 years. Muckraker wishes him well as he takes care of his camels that had missed him.

In all fairness, Size Two was not a terrible prime minister.

Especially when compared to the silly jokes that came after him.

The other one ruled from behind a petticoat while the other didnโ€™t rule at all.

The one from Makhoakhoeng just fumbled through his tenure until he was pushed out. His claim to fame as prime minister was to harass wool and mohair farmers and to sing โ€œha re na matlaโ€.

Oh, and donโ€™t forget that hideous pink suit that the Feselady threw over him.

That Thetsane one of the fake American accent didnโ€™t even try to rule.

He spent most of his time ducking rocks thrown by his own party instead of managing the governmentโ€™s affairs.

They all made MCCD look like a saint.

But MCCD must stop this business of trying to put lipstick on a frog.

He should just say I came, I saw and I tried.

Not this nonsense he was spewing in his farewell speech in parliament on Tuesday. Like a man reading his eulogy, MCCD said he sleeps well at night because he never stole from the government.

He said he can be investigated until Mohokare River followed back to Butha-Buthe but he will found to be clean.

He might be right and itโ€™s his right to blow his horn.

But that camel man is confusing a camel hump for a mountain.

The point is not that he was not corrupt.

He was a director of a den of thieves.

While he was busy ruling his people were stuffing their pockets with government funds.

They almost stole the soles of his shoes.

This is the man whose State House was buying a litre of juice for M100 and a litre of milk for M120.

All bought from Shoprite. Nothing special. Just lebese kapa topela. Kholu!

He can say he didnโ€™t know what was happening but he drank it anyway.

And he will probably live a little longer because of those expensive liquids.

Whether he was corrupt or not is not the issue.

He ate things corruptly bought.

And if MCCD insists on claiming that he hates corruption Muckraker would ask him to name one minister he fired for corruption.

Just oanenyana.

Muckraker is offering a holiday to anyone who can find a speech in which MCCD condemned any minister for corruption. Again, just oanenyana.

Muckraker remembers his baritone, Sesotho idioms and occasional insults.

Timer le le thibane.

Muckraker recalls when he taught people at one rally how to deal with those who say his government had not done anything to improve their lives.

He said they should drag them by the seam of their blankets to a tarred and ask if the road is their mother.

MCCD, MCCD, MCCD. Why?

He might not have stolen but he was the uncle who watched while the nieces and nephews finished the familyโ€™s chickens and eggs.

Some took cows while others pretended to buy Mercedes Benz for the price of a shoe. He didnโ€™t get any but he was at the gate while they drove off.

He even saluted and waved at them.

All the same, Muckraker sincerely believes that the clown that came after him was worse.

That one was just empty talk. Nyoe, nyoe, nyoe hunger is the enemy of the people while they fed a Chinese man with Basothoโ€™s wool and mohair.

Harassing our small local butcheries to benefit one Chinese chap.

How do you say Meraka in Chinese?

If there is heaven, none of those people who abused our wool and mohair farmers will enter it. They might not even be fit for hell.

Muckraker will not say anything about this one who says shibilishibilishili in American accent. We only remember him for saying Basotho ba hโ€™eso when he was announcing Covid19 measures in the colour of a traffic light. This week red, next week green.

All to give the impression that he was announcing something original when he was copying the nonsense from that one who used to start every Covid speech with โ€œMy fellow South Africansโ€.
Suffice it to say all of them have nothing on MCCD.

Goodbye Size Two. When Muckraker looks at what came after you she feels like grabbing you by the ears and kissing you. We were wrong to think you were the worst.

Look at the โ€˜thingsโ€™ that you left us with and what is yet to come.

Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuu!

muckraker.post@gmail.com

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Muckracker

Small and greedy chancers

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MUCKRAKER has not stopped laughing since attending the meeting between the Independent Electoral Commission (IEC) and treasurers of political parties.

The main agenda was how the parties would share the M5 million allocated for campaign funding. As the sharing formula was being announced Muckraker could see some leaders twisting their faces and fidgeting in their chairs.

The IEC said M1 million would be shared equally among all the contesting parties.

The leaders of smallanyana parties were calm until the IEC said the remaining M4 million would be shared proportionally among parties according to the number of votes they won in the previous election.

Suddenly, the smallanyana guys realised that they would not receive much. They lost their heads and started weaping about justice and fairness.

In the pandemonium, Mohatle Litaba, the Basotho Economic Enrichment (BEE) leader, stood to speak.

โ€œHow can the IEC say we should get into the ring and fight Goliaths yet we are Davids?โ€ Litaba said. Muckraker thought she saw a tear drop from Litabaโ€™s left eye as he said those words. It was as if his bread had been stolen.

That David versus Goliath story appeared to be shared by other leaders of smaller parties who thought big parties were getting a lionโ€™s share of the campaign funding.

It was a collective whimpering.

The David versus Goliath comparison sounded reasonable because Litaba was talking about size. His parties and many others are indeed small. The big are big for sure.

The only problem is that the smaller parties are not Davids.

For a start, the real story about David and Goliath is not about size but faith.

David defeated Goliath because he had faith that the Lord would protect him.

Unlike the parties that are demanding more money to fight in the election, David didnโ€™t ask for anything. Instead, he took his sling and picked five smooth stones from the river.

The king offered him an amour for protection but he said it was too big.

So there you have it. David faced Goliath with only faith, a sling and five stones.

The smallanyana parties should do the same if they are real Davids.

They donโ€™t need public funds to win this election.

They should have faith that they will win this election without public funding.

David only fought Goliath because his people were cornered.

Politicians enter an election for power and the benefits that come with it.

They are in it for themselves.

David was the anointed one to lead the nation of Israel. Muckraker doubts that the Lord would anoint the clowns in our politics to lead this country.

Nyoe, nyoe we are Davids. Cut the crap. You are Judas Iscariots.

And the bigger parties should not compare themselves to Goliath either because they are worse.

They have made our lives a living hell.

Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuu!

muckraker.post@gmail.com

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Muckracker

Small and greedy chancers

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MUCKRAKER has not stopped laughing since attending the meeting between the Independent Electoral Commission (IEC) and treasurers of political parties.

The main agenda was how the parties would share the M5 million allocated for campaign funding. As the sharing formula was being announced Muckraker could see some leaders twisting their faces and fidgeting in their chairs.

The IEC said M1 million would be shared equally among all the contesting parties.

The leaders of smallanyana parties were calm until the IEC said the remaining M4 million would be shared proportionally among parties according to the number of votes they won in the previous election.

Suddenly, the smallanyana guys realised that they would not receive much. They lost their heads and started weaping about justice and fairness.

In the pandemonium, Mohatle Litaba, the Basotho Economic Enrichment (BEE) leader, stood to speak.

โ€œHow can the IEC say we should get into the ring and fight Goliaths yet we are Davids?โ€ Litaba said. Muckraker thought she saw a tear drop from Litabaโ€™s left eye as he said those words. It was as if his bread had been stolen.

That David versus Goliath story appeared to be shared by other leaders of smaller parties who thought big parties were getting a lionโ€™s share of the campaign funding.

It was a collective whimpering.

The David versus Goliath comparison sounded reasonable because Litaba was talking about size. His parties and many others are indeed small. The big are big for sure.

The only problem is that the smaller parties are not Davids.

For a start, the real story about David and Goliath is not about size but faith.

David defeated Goliath because he had faith that the Lord would protect him.

Unlike the parties that are demanding more money to fight in the election, David didnโ€™t ask for anything. Instead, he took his sling and picked five smooth stones from the river.

The king offered him an amour for protection but he said it was too big.

So there you have it. David faced Goliath with only faith, a sling and five stones.

The smallanyana parties should do the same if they are real Davids.

They donโ€™t need public funds to win this election.

They should have faith that they will win this election without public funding.

David only fought Goliath because his people were cornered.

Politicians enter an election for power and the benefits that come with it.

They are in it for themselves.

David was the anointed one to lead the nation of Israel. Muckraker doubts that the Lord would anoint the clowns in our politics to lead this country.

Nyoe, nyoe we are Davids. Cut the crap. You are Judas Iscariots.

And the bigger parties should not compare themselves to Goliath either because they are worse.

They have made our lives a living hell.

Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuu!

muckraker.post@gmail.com

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Insight-pst

The RFPโ€™s cowards

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You have to feel sorry for those who won the RFPโ€™s primaries but failed to pass Uncle Samโ€™s meritocracy test.

One morning they are accepting their fate and pledging allegiance to Uncle Sam.

The next morning they are bellowing and galloping to court complaining about the same man. Itโ€™s a conglomeration of a confused lot.

A hotchpotch of desperate souls.

What is clear is that they are cowards.

Sister Phamotse is the poster girl of that group.

After being denied a chance to represent the Matlakeng constituency, the sister complained a little bit but eventually said she accepted the partyโ€™s decision.

She waxed lyrical about Uncle Samโ€™s leadership and compassion.

โ€œI attended the Thaba-Tseka rally in solidarity with the RFP because even though I didnโ€™t pass my interview, I remain cognisant of the principles which led me to the RFP,โ€ Dr Phamotse said.

โ€œThe party is working for a better Lesotho for all its citizens. I admire Sam Matekaneโ€™s leadership qualities.

He is an implementer who has done so much for the country even before he ventured into politics,โ€ she said.

โ€œNtate Matekane is a compassionate individual.

He cares about othersโ€™ needs and if he says I need to step aside so he can implement his plans, I am glad to do so because I believe in his ideals.

I have decided not to put myself first but to continue to back him (Matekane) for the greater good.โ€

โ€œSo, I wonโ€™t go to court to fight to become the party candidate,โ€ she added.

That was a few weeks ago.

Now she has changed her mind and is among the 16 people suing Matekane and his party.

If confusion was a person.

The duplicity is breathtaking. In August Matekane was an โ€œimplementerโ€ and โ€œcompassionate leaderโ€.

In September he is a leader who doesnโ€™t respect the peopleโ€™s will and likes to violate his partyโ€™s regulations.

Phamotse and her group say their decision is informed by the recent court victory of five other candidates who were in a position similar to theirs.

They say that ruling against the party shows that they were treated unfairly.

Yeh, right!

If it took them a court ruling to realise that they had been treated unfairly then they must stop whatever they are smoking.

That much has always been as naked as a goatโ€™s behind.

They were just too scared to fight the decision.

Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuu!

muckraker.post@gmail.com

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