A little story from Mabote

A little story from Mabote

Years ago, some rascals broke into Muckraker’s humble dwelling and helped themselves to food, a camera and some clothes. Muckraker rushed to Mabote Police Station where she encountered what is probably the daftest policeman to ever walk on Moshoeshoe’s soil.
Apart from failing to comprehend simple matters, the officer was having a torrid time with spellings and grammar. He was compensating for his lack of depth by being rude.

Irritated, Muckraker thought it would not hurt to add to his misery with the written word.
After all, he was a lost cause and it didn’t look like he had the capacity to investigate the case.
So, when he asked what food was stolen Muckraker went on a roll: Lasagne, bolognese, caviar and shrimp.
That predictably came out as lazanya, boronice, kaves and shiririmp in his atrocious handwriting.

After which he looked up from his book and gazed at Muckraker as if waiting for her confirmation that he got it right.
Muckraker just shook her head in disgust and suggested a total change of the list.
Milk, motoho, cabbage and papa. He was largely correct but still managed to make kabbich out of cabbage.
The message had been aptly conveyed though.

There was no point in mentioning yoghurt because that would have triggered pandemonium in his head. Only God knows what chaos the fingers would have unleashed on the paper.
He was visibly relieved but that gave him the confidence to ask silly questions.
Are you married? Why were you not home when they broke in? Do you have a child?

The futile interrogation continued until Muckraker was so pissed that she asked the police officer if he was circumcised.
“Ausi, what has that got to do with the burglary at your house?” the officer asked as he fought back his anger.
An angry exchange ensued as Muckraker insisted that since this was now a cross-examination about her marital status, she might as well ask if she is being helped by a circumcised officer.

The encounter didn’t end well. Muckraker was dismissed from the police station with a threat of being maimed if she returns.
That conversation stole the little respect Muckraker had for our police.
Since then, she has heard shocking stories that confirm that our police officers suffer from a combination of indolence and incompetence.

This is why she was stunned when the police swiftly arrested the leaders of the Concerned Youth People before they could even take out their placards last week. Our police will tell you they cannot investigate a murder because they don’t have vehicles. Often, you have to take them to the incident or accident scene. But they will always find the cars and resources to disrupt a peaceful protest, especially if it’s targeted at the government.

Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuu!

muckraker.post@gmail.com

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