The shouting madam from the US

The shouting madam from the US

Anyone with a modicum of exposure will admit that Maseru is a boring little place.
The restaurants are shoddy and the bars rowdy. Parks have been invaded by rascals bereft of any decency. Those yellow-bellied jalopies make walks treacherous. Our politics is predictably shallow.
A cesspool teeming with freeloading maggots. That is probably why US Ambassador Rebecca Gonzales has invented a new hobby. It’s called the Bellowing Game. Every month she has to find something for which to chastise the Lesotho government. And she is spoilt for choice when it comes to things to bellow about.

Our government specialises in bungling. It has to be constantly reminded to do the right thing. Left to its own devices, it is capable of spectacularly stupid things. Always pushing the frontiers of mediocrity.
Forever searching for new gaffes. So, madam Gonzales has her hands full as she battles to spank our government into line. She is like a rookie teacher in charge of a kindergarten class.

Hey, stop it! Don’t do that! Uena, Moeketsi watch your mouth! Mothibeli, get off the window now! Don’t pee on your toys. Stop pinching each other.
When her shrieking doesn’t work, she resorts to threats. Blah, blah, AGOA is under threat. Behave yourself or we will not renew the MCC. Nyoe, nyoe, we built hospitals for you. We gave you the road in Thamae. Your country will be a shanty town without our roads. All of which is not completely unreasonable noise.

Indeed, Lesotho has to sort out its mess and play by the rules if it wants to enjoy the US’s benevolence. The only trouble is that Gonzales has turned her shrieking into a hobby and is taking it too seriously.
And she has ample enablers ready to give her space to ramble on about obvious things. She is behaving like a big fish in a small pond. Were Gonzales in any other country that matters, she would have been summoned and told to watch her mouth. Her colleagues in proper countries don’t just run their mouths as she does.

She can do it here because we are a country that likes hand-outs. We are so passionate about free things that we call ‘donors’ ‘development partners’.
He who feeds you controls you. Our government cannot raise a finger to protest because Madam Gonzales will report us to her bosses and they will close the taps.
So, Mr Softie and his government have to meekly swallow whatever the madam says. Hearing her speak, you would think AGOA has created the best jobs in the world. The madam will not be visiting any of those AGOA sweatshops because she knows they are hell holes.

Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuu!

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