WHEN it comes to leadership, humans are the most overrated species. They think they are the most sophisticated in the animal kingdom yet there is nothing unique about their leadership skills.
Animals too use force, coups, elections, quorums, seniority and consensus to either rule or make decisions.
Chimpanzees use physical force to control their group’s resources like food and sex (and yes, sex is a resource even among humans).
Their leaders are what one scientist has described as “self-interested thugs” ruling by terrorising the group. More like some of our leaders, right.
But some sophisticated chimpanzee leaders also rule by building coalitions and bonds in the group. We have those too. Among elephants, the oldest female is the leader because of her knowledge of sensing danger and looking for food and water.
Hyenas rule by social rank. Honey bees are more complex because they use both force and persuasion to choose a queen.
A hive creates several queens by feeding them a special diet. They then leave the potential queens to sting each other for supremacy, with the last bee standing becoming the queen.
But when they face a life-and-death decision on where to move or split up a hive their process is impressively more democratic than humans. Hundreds of bees from the hive go out to scout for new sites and report back on their finding.
A scout that dances more enthusiastically on their return to the hive convinces the other scouts to go check out his site. Once a certain number of scouts have visited the location the bees decide that they have reached a quorum and they return to the hive to get the others to follow them to the new site.
That is remarkable because it is way better than humans. A scout bee will never lie to other bees about the suitability of a new site because that will endanger the whole group. It acts in the best interests of the group because its fate is linked to that of the group. It is part of the team.
The same cannot be said for our politicians because they live for themselves. Their fate is never linked to that of the people and the country.
You will also notice that animals are led by the wisest, strongest, cutest or smartest. But no matter what happens, animals will never allow themselves to be led by the dullest in their group.
Humans do exactly that. We are probably the only species that allows itself to be led by imbeciles and idiots in their groups. If you think Muckraker is lying, ask yourself if your MP is the smartest person in your constituency.
If your answer is yes, you are likely to be a dunderhead wasting our precious oxygen. Tšolo cannot and will never be the smartest man from Mafeteng yet he has staggered his way into several parliaments.
Where is Muckraker going with this?
Well, the events in parliament last week have proved that we have allowed ourselves to be led by morons. Their only job in this tenth parliament was to pass the reforms. Yet they spent their time clobbering each other and clambering tables over trivial issues. Some of them even groped each other.
15 minutes before parliament was dissolved they suddenly remembered that they had reforms to pass. Now they are telling us that they ran out of time as if they started working on the reforms two weeks ago.
Our problem is not that we are a poor country. No. It is not that we are in the belly of South Africa. No. We simply lack leadership. We lack leadership because we vote nincompoops into leadership.
We then pretend to be shocked when they pee in the village well. We deserve the embarrassment and shame we are enduring.
Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuu!
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