YOU know factionalism has reached the gutter when zealots start getting angry on the party leader’s behalf. Our party politics is never far from the septic tank but some times the speed with which it jumps into the manure pond is shocking. Take for instance the succession high jinks in the Democratic Congress (DC).

Muckraker cannot understand why some in the DC’s kindergarten are hopping mad at the suggestion that Size Two should make way for others. After all, the party was going to have this debate sooner rather than later. Size Two is 71 and there is nothing sinful with people whispering that it’s time to vamoose. Old people must be told to rest because they sometimes forget that their bodies are not made of iron.

You cannot be punished for saying: Tsamaea u eo phomola ntate. It is the duty of every young person to persuade old people to take a break. Muckraker suspects the old man also wants to rest.

But tell that to the youths in the league if you want your face rearranged with blows.

There is a group bellowing for SizeTwo to rule for the next 40 years.  How a mere mortal from Tseolike is expected to achieve this feat, only advocates of this inane idea know.

The mathematics of it all doesn’t even make sense. In 40 years the Idiom Master will be 111 years. Almost all people of that age have joined their ancestors, mostly by natural causes.

They don’t do a post-mortem when you die at that age. It’s all natural causes.

If any is still breathing the same air with us then they are the exceptional ones spared by the Almighty. Either that or they are lying about their real age.

Now imagine Size Two forty years from now, on a wheelchair and mucus streaming from his nose. How does a man who cannot even remember what he ate in the morning run a country? It is a violation of human dignity to force a man who cannot even take himself to the bathroom to remain in power. It’s evil.

The notion that Size Two should rule for the next 40years is evil even if we start counting from 1998 when he came to power. It means he will be 95 when the neophytes finally release him from bondage.

Still by them he will be moving around with a nurse and perhaps a bag of diapers. Surely there is no sense in putting a senior citizen marching towards his plot at the cemetery through such misery.

Apart from being ridiculous the beery calls for Size Two to rule for forty years is a pathetic way of trying to duck the succession debate that is now long overdue.

But there is more to this brainless idea than meets the eye.

It would be at least fathomable if the calls were coming from Size Two’s age mates. That it’s coming from young people who should have the ambition to lead the party and run the country at some point is astonishing. Let’s do the mathematics.

Youth members are supposed to be below 35. Now if they want Size Two to lead for 40 years it means the oldest member of the youth league can only start dreaming of replacing the leader when they are 75. Remember life expectancy in Lesotho is 39, so the chance of the oldest youth league member reaching 75 is zilch. It’s not that simple but you get the drift. The evidence is there for all to see. They are smoking something illegal and drinking toxic things. And they fornicate like there is no tomorrow.

You know there is a dearth of ambition in the youth league when its members fight tooth and nail for a leader to rule forever.

If the youth league wants to see one of their own leading the country and party then they must be on the other side of the fight. They must be telling Size Two to go tend his camels and sing lullabies to his grandchildren.

Enter Thuso Litjobo, the DC youth league president, who has lost control of the motor that runs his mouth. He said he was now moving around with a gun because some people wanted him dead.

It all sounds sensible, only that there is no evidence that he never carried a gun before the alleged threats.

He has always spoken like a gun carrier. Even now, there is no evidence that he is carrying a gun. Even if he is carrying one we cannot be cock sure he is doing so because of politics. It’s possible that with his untreatable verbal diarrhoea the man could have angered people outside political circles.

Last week the man exercised his insolence on the DC Women’s League president PontsoSekatle. Sekatle was not at the meeting so Litjobo was emboldened to spank her until his hand was numb. Even when his hand was sore the kindergarten leader could not stop.

He wanted the world to know he can stand up to Sekatle, in her absence of course.

In a wide-ranging rant Litjobo said Sekatle should behave herself because he can expose “her personal secrets”.

That sounded to be a lame threat for if he had anything on Sekatle he would have said it at that meeting. Instead what he managed were just more empty threats, silly insults and unsubstantiated allegations.

Muckraker asked: whose Chihuahua is this? Whoever owns it must keep his gate locked because this Chihuahua is getting out of hand.

We should give credit where it is due. For that reason Muckraker will doff her hat to Advocate Haae Phoofolo for his illuminating article in the other weeklyon the trials and tribulations of the Court of Appeal President Justice KananeloMosito.

Phoofolorightly stated that Justice Mosito’s troubles have nothing to do with his alleged failure to file tax returns on time as the state alleges. The case, he said, is about the attempt to capture the apex court and other state institutions.

It was a scrumptious assessment delivered in emphatic language synonymous with the senior lawyer he is. Instantly, he had summed up the pith and marrow of that which ails Lesotho: the use of political power for a nefarious personal agenda.

Until that point he had the broader picture firmly in his sights. A useful and instructive conclusion was therefore inevitable. We could have learned lessons here.

But suddenly, as if history is of no consequence to his otherwise splendid argument, Phoofolo veered off course and found himself on a slippery slope.

He sought to use a patently discredited narrative to shore up an argument he had already won. His mistake was to couch the attempt to capture state institutions as a recent invention of the current government.

Principal Secretaries were fired and diplomats harassed, he said. Phew!

Muckraker recalls that Phoofolo was part of the previous government that also used the same tactic he now frowns upon. Government pummelled the previous Court of Appeal president until he threw in the towel. Charges were dug up to buttress the government’s argument that he was unfit to lead the court.

That same government tried to push out the Attorney General, Director of Public Prosecutions and the army commander. The same government also fired PSs.

Advocate Phoofolo does have a strong argument but he applies it sparingly to reach a narrow conclusion. He disperses blame instead of dealing with the problem that persists regardless of who is leading the government.

The result is that he misses an opportunity to educate us about a serious political problem. The capture of state institutions is wrong yesterday, today and forever.Those who want to change things cannot be on both sides of the argument. They must attack the concept, not incidences of it.

Once again a storm has erupted in South Africa. At the centre of it is President Jacob Zuma. Obvious!The brouhaha is about an unnamed school that used a drawing of cartoonist Zapirodepicting Zuma with a shower head floating in a pool of money and having a drink.

The first question is who the man in the cartoon is while the second one is whether the student will vote for him.

One pupil wrote: “No I wouldn’t (vote for Zuma) because he looks way too stupid to think about others and he’s swimming in money, which shows that he is selfish when it comes to money.”

Next to the answer is a “Good”, supposedly a compliment from the teacher for a brilliant answer.

Government officials went berserk as soon as the question paper was leaked. The Gauteng MEC for education said he was launching an investigation and heads will fall.

Phew! You can be sure that someone from the ANC rank and file will call this a racist attack on the president.

They will accuse the school of fanning hatred against their president. Muckraker still cannot understand what the fuss is all about. It’s not clear what has angered the government more, the questions or the answers.

The question is fair because it relates to a leader of a country and what students think of him. Democracy!

The answer is fantastic because it says precisely what Zuma is, a selfish leader living large on government money while the masses wallow in abject poverty. Indeed he looks “too stupid” as the student said.

He is “way too stupid to think about others”, the student said.

And “he’s swimming in money, which shows that he is selfish when it comes to money,” the wiz kid said.

Someone give that kid a scholarship. Instead of frothing at the mouth the ANC should be happy that it now knows what the young generation thinks of Zuma. Kikikikikikikikikkii.Let the daughter of ‘MaMuckraker laugh. Good weekend!