Uncle Sam should have a conference to deal with all those who claim to have helped him get elected. Such a meeting is urgent because everyone is claiming to have played a huge role in his election. People who merely sang and whistled at his rallies say it’s their noises that got him into power.
Those who danced say it is their kinetic energy that delivered the victory. They say it is their gyrations and bumjives that swayed voters to him.
Those who sold makoenya at rallies insist they played a role because they fed his supporters. You hear the same entitlement from those who merely waved at his helicopter during the campaign.
Muckraker can forgive such delusions because people generally overate themselves. It makes them feel good and important.
Yet such people are just minor irritants for Uncle Sam because they are not hard to please. A little shift in their fortunes will appease them.
The real headache for Uncle Sam is the people who think they did something substantial to get him elected.
These are people who did small things like print 20 T-shirts for their own campaign, hire a kombi for 15 people to attend a rally or bought some food for a few supporters. They organised village meetings or formed WhatsApp groups.
Uncle Sam didn’t know that those people were going to send him inflated invoices when he became prime minister.
They were volunteers but are now demanding an arm and a leg. They want big jobs and tenders.
But Uncle Sam doesn’t have to give in to their demands. He should just call a conference and ask everyone to state the value of their contribution.
He will then pay them in cash, declare that they are square and tell them to stop demanding special favours.
A T-shirt is M100. One loti for every RFP post on Facebook. Say M500 for opening an RFP WhatsApp group.
He can even pay double the price to shut them up. That is the only way to get monkeys off his back.
Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuuu
muckracker.post@gmail.com
